Dr Gabor Mate

Attempt to Escape Pain

According to Dr Gabor Mate, addiction is essentially an attempt to escape pain. Addiction involves much more than substance misuse.

Many objects and behaviors become addictive. The problem is you can’t permanently escape.

In addition, eventually, the payoff from escape will fade and the consequences will become steep.

Depression and other mental/emotional issues make the desire for escape even more profound.

When you look around and compare yourself to other people it can make you desire escape even more.

Because you tell yourself how terrible and crappy your life is compared to them.

Pile on more pain.

A Few Things

Clearly understand a few things. Their apparently perfect life involves plenty of pain and they are either:

1. Blindly and desperately trying to escape through self destructive behaviors themselves. In which case you can relate, as there have been times you have felt this way. In addition, you don’t need to envy them because they are in the middle of their own difficulty.
2. Working on themselves and therefore on the same journey as you. In the case they are on the same team and probably experience the same misgivings that you are.

Also understand that there COULD be better days ahead.

It’s sketchy for anyone to tell you this darkness will definitely pass.

But it is 100% true to say that it is POSSIBLE for less pain in the future.

A Few More Things to Remember

Perhaps there is great merit in struggling through.

Perhaps there is something larger at play. There is merit in trying to not give in. Your life in beautiful. Despite the way you fell or your perceived shortcomings. The good, the bad and the ugly.

My stuff is always upside down…. I’m always fighting escape.

The only thing I do right is I keep coming back for more… never give up.

I’m an expert at getting back on the wagon because I fall off so often!